The Honest No

How can you tell someone the honest no, when you believe it may hurt their feelings?

Learning ways to communicate in a honest way means more than just saying what's on our mind. Being able to communicate honestly means being able to respond with either a "Yes" or "No" that we believe to be true in the moment. It means that we need to detach from the "Story" that we may have that it may hurt or disappoint another. It is possible to love without conditions, even when our answer is "No".

What's important to remember is to realize that an honest "No" to another person is a "Yes" to us.

As you continue to read this page, also realize that

We Teach what we most need to learn

If you need more clarification, this is one of my own biggest lessons to learn at this moment in time.

For the time being be aware and notice your own actions.Because of my own story, my personality, and where I am in my own life, it's another learning tool to practice, and observe.

Sometimes saying no to another even when I may not want to do something makes me feel guilty, or rude, or inconsiderate.I get that this was the way I was taught. I now have the tools to change what I choose to change, and this is a way to do just that.

People including us ask for many things....

By following the examples below which I have taken from the Work of Byron Katie, you can practice your honest No to these requests. The truth is that when you stay out of the story you can begin to hear and respect that those around you are asking for what they want. When you reply to their requests by using words such as

"and": you join with the person just as when you use the word "but" you seperate. These are listed in my "swear words" page These are examples, and like anything else, you will want to discover and use the words that are the most caring, natural honest for you, and link it to the honest No. You will need to play around with this, so that when you are saying it to someone it will be your own words, and way of saying it so that it doesn't sound like you are just reading it from a book. Yes at first is sounds strange, and it may not work. It may become frustrating......From personal experience, remember to check your intent. Use this rule if it helps.Listen, digest, BREATH, is it coming from a place of for you and not against other? Then give your answer. Examples of an honest no



footer for honest no page