The effects of fear can have a lasting impact
The effects of fear can have a
lasting impact on an individuals life.
It has been proven over and over again, by many different experts how the experiences during the first 6-12 years of a child's life, has a lasting impact on the rest of their life. These experiences,
arrest the developmental growth, and maturation.
It is this arrest which continues well into adult life. With all of this research clearly showing how the the effects of this developmental maturation affects a child's life, affects their ability to learn, grow, and rest and every single aspect of their life, "why is it, that so many well meaning parents, teachers and caregivers, can't do something to change this?"
Because we are all experiencing our own effects of fear.
How many times have you heard yourself saying: "It's too late, the damage has been done?' How many times have you caught yourself thinking: "He/she is a lost cause? These initial experiences continue to be reinforced by situations, which can be perceived as similar by the subconscious mind. These initial experiences are what continue to affect every adult years later. Every failed relationship, and I have news for anyone who believes "It's too late and nothing can be done." .
"It is Never Too Late"
to change the effects of fear created by your early childhood experiences. It is never too late to change your own false sense of fear, no matter how traumatic or repetitive and yes even how sensitive you believe your experiences to be. More importantly today, your child's experiences and everything they do, see and think come from you, and it is never too late.
It is the Perceptions of the Adults, in every child's life which can continue to make it impossible, for any type of developmental growth, and Maturation to take place, and it is the
Perceptions of the Adults
that can help the child emerge, and grow and mature to the best of their ability. When you understand this
developmental science, you are creating the opportunity to make a difference!
Learning disabilities and behavioral "problems"
Begin by changing your perceptions,
and changing the way you see yourself and everyone in your care, and everyone in your life. It is this understanding and knowledge which brings new eyes to the way a parent and teacher can see and more importantly can help a child grow and mature to the best of their ability.
A learning disability,
and, or a
"behavioral problem"
can stem from a vulnerability or a sensitivity too much to bear. You don't have to know every exact detail, about the whys or whens, or whose, because all you have to do, is these behaviors or learning challenges, differently. See them as a fear of separation. See them as " A cry for Love." See them with eyes of compassion and empathy, and change the way you approach every signal situation. Rather than making your goal about changing the child, explore and question how you can create an attachment, a safe base, in which a child can begin to emerge, grow and feel attached. Yes the effects of fear can be changed to trust, acceptance and love.
You could be the agent of change creating a safe base in which a child can rest.
When ever you find yourself believing that a child's behavior is intentional, think again, and choose to remember it's instinctual, and stems from the effects of Fear. When ever you are in doubt, remember fear of separation, doesn't matter where or when, what matters is that you begin to approach each child from a different place in you. Seeing these situations differently, from the adult is what creates in the adult a different energy and it is this energy, this acceptance, and this unconditional love which will always be your best best. Without attachment no one stands a chance of diffusing the effects of fear which show up with behavior such as aggression and bullying. These are the effects of fear. Often times we look
at stopping the behavior,
by implementing more time out's and more time talking about how it's too late to change this child. Sometimes we spend so much energy wanting to blame someone or something for the behavior, and we are so focused on stopping the behavior, and sadly we don't even realize how we continue to reinforce these effects of fear. Remembering that at it's very root, a fear of separation, will soften our hearts, and with the softening of our hearts, we have the opportunity to make a difference. Change your thoughts, change your mind, change the way you see, because although well meaning, believing that the intention is being done to you on purpose, only reinforces the effects of fear and continue to suppress and arrest maturation. Our job, as parents, and teachers, and human beings is to brings new eyes into all situations, "So that we may see it differently.
IT IS NEVER TOO LATE TO CHANGE THE EFFECTS OF FEAR.

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