Building Confidence
Building confidence can be a learned skill, and self esteem can be restored. Not being born with it, not getting it from your parents, or other people in your life is no excuse or reason to use if you are here reading this. They are just that excuses and reasons to not even try, for fear of failing. This is a fear you have always had, and the choice is yours to stay stuck or to break free! 10 Tips to Building Confidence;STOP PUTTING YOURSELF DOWN Modesty is well and good, but (notice how "but" fits well in this comment, "it kills everything that comes in front of it") if you keep saying "I'm clumsy," "I'm fat," or "I'm not good enough," you will begin to believe it-and so will others. Don't advertise your inadequacies.STOP APOLOGIZING (This one was my personal favorite)You only sabotage yourself and raise doubts about your work by constantly apologizing. don't hand in a project saying, "I know this could be better" or "I'm sorry this was not done sooner." Instead, build positive expectations by saying, "Here's the report, I've given it my best." STOP SOUNDING WISHY-WASHY Watch for conversational phrases like "I guess," "maybe" "I suppose" or "I may be wrong, but...." Don't preface statements with "Don't you think?" or make your statements sound like questions. If you don't sound convinced of what you are saying, how can anyone else be? STOP SAYING "I CAN'T (I've started saying this to my kids so often, they now go, I know I know, Great thing about this, is I know they are listening, when they correct me too!) Just because you have never been good at math or writing or speaking to a group does not mean you can't learn. pay close attention Adults Adults, because they are more motivated, are often better at learning than when they were children. Give yourself a chance and you may be surprised at your potential. STOP PROCRASTINATING Everyone is busy and it is easy to find excuses to put off signing up for a course or talking to your boss about ways to advance or to explore new careers. Making a move, however small, toward your goal is the only way to get where you want to go. Energy generates more energy. GET moving! Most of us do a great part of breaking our confidence rather than building it up. This is part of my learning process too. This is an opportunity to learn and practice, and in time confidence can be rebuilt. Would you like to advertise on this page? !-- Begin: AdBrite --> START BUILDING YOURSELF UP Everyone has a positive side. Instead of worrying about your weaknesses, make a list of your good points-all of them. Keep remind yourself of the things you do well, this skills you have with people or machines or plants, your tennis game, you artistic side or your organizational ability. Talk yourself up-no down. START PLAYING THE PART (When I first began taking clients out to lunch many years ago, I remember my boss saying to me, "Just Play The Part, it all begins to fall into place.") Look at the way successful people dress and behave, and do the same yourself. Look people in the eye, shake hands firmly (practice this with someone, it needs to be really firm). Speak distinctly and dress well. No one can see inside to know you are quaking. When you behave more confidently, you even fool yourself. Before you know it, you really will feel more confident. START VOLUNTEERING (THIS ONE WORKS WONDERS, I'm currently volunteering two hours a week, reading to kids at a school, and the rewards for me are fulfilling.) When you have the chance to take on new responsibilities, don't say, "I'm not sure I can handle it." Say, "I'm excited at the challenge" instead. START DREAMS Fantasies are not a waste of time. Picture yourself the way you want to be, think about performing well and succeeding on the job.(Use it everywhere not just for jobs, it works!) It can be a rehearsal for reality. START SETTING GOALS Think about where you would like to be in a year or five years. Then write down the steps you must take to get there and begin-one step at a time. So, that's it, the 10 steps to building confidence. If you have any doubts whatsoever about how well these will work for you, guess what? You will have doubts! Building Confidence is a proven way to success! Only you can do it for you! And only you can see how well it works! There is also a very important point that I would like to share with you. It is your intent. Your intent, your reason, and your motivation starts with you. It is always for you. Pay close attention to your heart...it will tell you your intent, and always remember to come from a place of Love, and always for your highest good, and not against any one, not even yourself. This is Step 11 to building confidence:Be clear. Always be For your highest good and never against others. This is the eleventh step to building confidence, and The Step for you to use with every aspect of your life. Am I Clear?When ever you are in doubt, Ask yourself "Why am I doing this, Who am I doing it for?" If your answer is not for your highest good, then start again.Ask for clarification. Talk it over with someone. Talk to me. Send me your questions. Go from Building Confidence to Definition of Destructive Self Talk Share Your Resources and Tools with OthersWe all have different resources and tools that we may like over another. Different learning styles and tastes. Share yours here.
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